Last week, a Red Baron delivery guy, Walt Z., was restocking frozen pizzas in a grocery store late at night when a social media influencer wannabe, looking for clickbait, walks up and asks him what time it is. Walt (smiling and friendly about it) pulls out his phone to tell him.
When he does, this POS proceeds to tap his phone next to Walt’s and proclaims he just swiped money from Walt with Apple Pay. On a livestream. For clicks. Walt realizes what’s going on, realizes he’s being filmed and goes to report him to the manager.
Then, because this idiot doesn’t have a single functioning brain cell or anything that would resemble social skills or manners, he strolls past Walt and the store manager and smirks, “Thanks for the twenty dollars, man.”
Walt does not laugh. Instead, he delivers a rant almost as good as Colonel Jessup in A Few Good Men.
“No, it’s not a joke to me. I don’t have time for this crap in my life. My life is hard enough as it is.” He continues, “I got kids at home that went to bed without me right now. I was supposed to be home an hour ago and I’m still out here WORKING. And I got to get up at 5 in the morning and do 10 more stores. So, this is NOT a joke to me. You’re probably making money off of this and I can’t even pay my f****** mortgage!”
This dipshit’s comeback? "It's not that deep, man. It's just a joke."
And then the internet did something it almost NEVER does. It got it right.
A total stranger named Luke Oakenshield started a GoFundMe for Walt, and it's racing toward half a million dollars. The dude who tried to prank Walt deactivated ALL of his social media accounts (the digital equivalent of hiding behind your mother's leg) due to the widespread backlash he rightly received.
An attorney posted, “If anyone knows this man or the backstory here, please put him in touch with me…will do whatever we can to support, including pro bono legal services if needed.”
And Red Baron, a company named after a World War I fighter ace (which feels poetic here), posted this on X:
"He's still here. He's got a fan club. Including us." Along with a graphic announcing that employee of the month nominations are closed. "You know why."
More than 4.5 million views. Chef's kiss.
First of all, this social media influencer culture is absolute garbage. I have a teenager (and a 12-year-old in training), so I'm not exactly unfamiliar with the species. For a lot of these kids, a phone has become a permission slip to be a disrespectful, ill-mannered jackass. The guy who was secretly filming Walt says he specialized in “nuisance streaming” which relies on confrontational public pranks designed to elicit reactions from unsuspecting people for monetization.
Shove a camera in a stranger's face, poke them until they snap, post the meltdown and call it "content." That's not clever. That's bullying and harassment. For the record, that camera on your phone doesn't make you an entertainer any more than a Halloween stethoscope from Amazon makes you a cardiologist.
I stood up and applauded when Walt delivered that smackdown instead of cowering for fear of being canceled. SOMEBODY has to confront these turds who think anything goes under the umbrella of being a “joke” or to win likes.
Second, I want to applaud Red Baron.
They had a choice. Their employee, on the job, cussed out a guy in the middle of a customer's store, on camera, in front of millions. He told the guy he'd better not be outside when Walt leaves, implying he would have kicked his ass.
The cowardly corporate playbook usually is: "We are aware of the video. This behavior does not reflect our values. The individual is no longer with the company." HR drafts it in fifteen minutes, legal approves it in five and Walt, who was already stretched thin, gets fired. Four kids, no paycheck, but corporate executives who don’t have to deal with the crap Walt has to deal with get to have filet for dinner that night.
Instead, Red Baron said OUT LOUD: we've got his back.
Was Walt's language a little salty? Sure. Loud? Absolutely. Was he wrong? Not even a little. And every frozen-pizza buyer in America just learned more about what kind of company Red Baron is from one post than they'd learn from a $10 million Super Bowl ad. That's brand loyalty you can’t buy. It can only be authentically earned.
I don’t even eat frozen pizza…but I’m buying a whole freezer full this weekend, purely on principle. I suggest you do the same.
Well done, Red Baron. Well done.